Submitted to the 18-25 Project

You have been my friend for so long now
I needed you to help me through
You were there when everyone else looked away
You held my hand when I was at play
I'm so grateful for your help

But now I am so sad
For it is time to let you go
I don't want to
I am sorry
But really you are not a friend, are you?
You pretend,
your fake,
A friend would not destroy me and try to kill me
A friend should give life light love
And you did that, for a long time,
But it was not really a good life
You fooled me into it
But I did want it because I needed it
I chose you and you chose me
You made me hope for destructive things
For thinness, invisibility, isolation, a bed of lillies

You have stolen my teenage years
I am angered at myself for letting you
You pretty greedy blonde haired fool
You are the one I should be angered at
Your sweet voice
the tempting tone
the comforting sounds
Your harsh voice
the curse of your words
the poisoning sounds
Yes you, look at yourself, look at what you have done
You are the one who should shrink, disappear
Not me,
I want to live, to live without you

Ha, I've been privileged with a glimpse of life without you
Before I was fooled, but now I can see through you, so,
Dear friends, anorexia the devil, anorexia the gaurdian angel, bulimia the monster, bulimia my envelopping friend, BED the compulsive comforter,
You gave me hugs, you made me cold, you gave me a smile, you made me sad, you gave me a net, you trapped me in it.
I am sorry to say, even though I love you, you must leave me now, please go, go away and shrivel a corner of the world out of harms way.
Life is full of hope and promise. There is so much to do, the wolrd is a shiny red lobster, and we all can to do it, we all can do it.
It is the first time I am going to live my life for ME, a normal life, where your whsipers do not haunt me and send me insane, but where a child's smiley face, lights me with a smile....
The future is here for me to live, and you are not a part of it,
Hooooraaaah!

A Journey Of A Thousand Miles Begins With A Single Step - reovery is a process, step by step, i believe it is possible, not easy, but possible, take the bad days with a pinch of salt.

© Copyright Notice
The story on this page is presented here with thanks, with the express permission of Jenna the author. Copyright remains soley with the author and this material may not be reproduced without the author's express consent.